Work Reflections
Managing relationships in the workplace
09NOV2025
I feel I need to address my issues of my private life bleeding into my professional life. My current plan to handle this is to make a clear demarcation between my professional and private lives - theoretically, then through follow-up action.
Firstly, what do I want people at work to know about me? What do I not want them to know about me?
- I don't want to share what I get up to on the weekend >>> Stock answer: 'Not much. You?'
- I don't want to share if I'm feeling stressed, sad or angry >>> Contemporaneous assessment of emotions, taking up stress-relieving hobbies
- I don't want to share my future plans or ambitions >>> Focus on my interest in bettering the patient experience + ensuring safety (this is a good way to subvert from my own plans as it isn't dishonest, it's just a fragment of the truth)
- I want to hold my tongue - my colleagues don't need to know that I barely tolerate them >>> Create stock answers for common questions, like interviewing
- How are you feeling about the new study? >>> Challenged, but I'm excited to learn as much as I can
- Are you stressed? You look stressed? >>> I feel the pressure, but I'm working on setting realistic, achievable goals. // I'm feeling fine, I'm not really one for extra pep is all.
- What do you think about [insert non-work-related topic]? >>> I don't have any particularly strong feelings - what do you think?
- What do you think about [work-related topic]? >>> I agree with the team's sentiments so far. I'm concerned right now about how I can streamline the process for our team to reduce the workload on everyone, while still ensuring we're meeting our data entry goals. I recognise [insert current difficulties faced by colleagues]. [Insert information relevant to the topic at hand].
- I want to appear as opaque as possible - no one at that place has a right to my private life >>> Easy smiles, appear as bland as possible so as not to raise any interest
- I want to perform an 'irreplaceable' niche >>> Of course, this does not truly exist, but I can work towards it. One thing I realise I'm quite good at is research - I know I can work harder than others. If I expend a lot of time on research and keeping a clear archive of how we came to whatever state the study is in now, I will be providing a good support to the team, who lacks strength in that kind of deep-level work. Suit up, detective.
I've snapped twice at work. I'm prone to passive-aggressive remarks. Two things I think will help with abating that is (1) keeping my mouth shut and giving myself time to answer, and (2) detaching myself from the social outcomes of work.
For the most part, I don't like the people in my workplace. I tolerate them, but I'm not interested in their lives. So why should I care about fitting into a circle that I find barely tolerable? Time spent alone is more valuable to me than time spent in company.
It is funny how often I've been told I only feel this way because I grew up sheltered from having a social life. What is funny is that it was people who wanted to get 'in', who left my hair standing on end, that assert that. It is likely a learned preference, but it is a preference I carry into my adult life.
All I have to have confidence in is that I hold my tongue, don't say anything unnecessary or rude, and contribute in a way that is valuable enough to the team that they can't fire me.
I think also paying particular attention to how I can improve my care for the patients (treating them with dignity) and refine my data skills.
Currently, my focus will be on improving/updating the esource for the current study, refining the diary training process, and documenting the history of the study (uploading relevant files for reference + built question and answer tracker that provides a concrete timeline).